![]() ![]() I would say #SorryNotSorry or some such trendy hashtag slang but, well, I’m too old and tired for that too.Everything that makes email so convenient-free messages, quick delivery-also makes it susceptible to spam. None of us is getting any younger, and our kids fill up a good chunk of our bullshit bucket so we’ve got to dump some of that other crap out when we can. The list of unnecessary crap we have to deal with goes on and on but, like I said, I’m letting that shit go. If you’re going to write something about how woman should just write about motherhood and diapers, do not comment. If you’re going to spout out a bunch of misinformation, do not comment. If you’re going to be an asshole, do not comment. To put it bluntly: If you didn’t read the article, don’t comment. Not only am I too old and tired for your Michael Jackson popcorn-eating meme comment bullshit, but I’m also too busy to correct all of your assholery. Believe me, I do enough second-guessing of myself I don’t need to worry about the judgments coming from other people too. Lately it seems that parenting and judging others go hand in hand. Basically, if you think you’re better than anyone because of your race, gender, sexual orientation or religion, I do not have time for your assholery. Fortunately, they have this handy little button called Unfriend (or Unfollow if I’m trying to be polite about it), and with one little click I can say goodbye to the nasty filth that makes me fear for humanity and the cringe-worthy posts that make me want to throw up in my mouth a little bit. Okay, okay, so maybe I’m guilty of Internet screaming now and then, but seriously, these days, just a few minutes on Facebook makes me feel like I need to put on a HazMat suit, pour a stiff drink, or stab a fork in my eyes (sometimes all the above). I get screamed at enough by my kids I don’t need it from the Internet too. Social media nonsense.Ĭan we all agree that soapbox videos taken in the car have jumped the shark? And the ALL CAPS SCREAMING? Please. Life is too short for food that tastes like regret and disappointment. And the passive-aggressive snarkiness that abounds? My standard response these days is bless your heart, which can basically be translated into STFU. I’ve been doing so much eye-rolling at the humblebrags on social media lately that it’s become an occupational hazard. Humblebrags, passive aggressiveness, and all kinds of petty. And if you’re a lying liar who tells me one thing and someone else something else, I just cannot with that. We’ll smile and exchange pleasantries while we endure those painfully long baseball tournaments, but we aren’t going to be real friends. ![]() If you can’t be real with me and bitch about how your kids are whining whiners or admit that you’ve considered escaping to a hotel alone for a week, we just cannot be friends. You know that fake friend who’s life is always squeaky clean and she never complains and she loves her kids so much and she’s #soblessed all the freaking time? Yeah, no thanks. I’m too old, too tired, and too busy for this assholery bullshit nonsense. Look, there comes a point in every person life when you realize: life’s too short for bullshit. We can be selective about the fucks we give, and take a hard pass on the craptastic nonsense infiltrating our lives. ![]() One of the most beautiful things about being an adult is that we can say NO to the unnecessary bullshit. ![]() Watching HGTV with our spouse and spending an entire Sunday afternoon at a youth baseball tournament only to watch our son strike out three times fall squarely in this category.Īnd then there’s the unnecessary bullshit that somehow creeps into our life, cluttering our mind up like a clogged toilet we ignore until shit is literally overflowing. Then there’s the bullshit we grumble about, but do nonetheless because it’s with or for someone we love. And if you’re a parent you can bump that number up quite a bit.įirst, there’s the bullshit we have to deal with like credit card bills, mortgages, and Monday morning conference calls. I’m pretty sure being an adult is 85% dealing with bullshit you don’t want to deal with. ![]()
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